Five ways to let go of bad friends

Move on and keep going strong

Your thoughts (121)

Friendship is a wonderful gift. It makes life exciting in many ways. But once in a while, we realise a “friend” isn’t so great.

They put us down and say mean things to us. They talk bad about us behind our backs. They don’t want the best for us.

This is called a toxic friendship. It’s not healthy for anyone. In such situations, it’s smart to end things. To let go of that “friend” and move on.

It’s not easy to cut someone out of our lives. But it can be done. Here’s how:

Be sure
First, make sure you don’t want to be friends with them anymore. Nobody is perfect. We shouldn’t let a “friend” go just because they hurt us once. But if they’ve hurt us many times, it’s okay to break away. Let’s try not to be sad. Instead, let’s stand our ground. We all deserve to be happy.

Have a face-to-face chat
Sit them down and talk. Be honest. We need to share the hurtful things they’ve done. We need to say why we can’t be friends anymore. Let’s avoid blaming them. We may have played a part too. No yelling or fighting, please. Name-calling isn’t cool either. If we’re nervous, we can practise in front of mirror first.

Write to them
Sometimes it’s okay to write things down instead of saying them. So why don’t we send this “friend” a note? It’ll help us express our thoughts clearly. Also, we’ll be likely to spot, um, offensive words and remove them. Breakups should be handled with care.

Don’t say bad stuff about them
When the friendship ends, the gist will spread fast. Troublemakers will try to make us spill our former friend’s secrets. They’ll come with all sorts of ‘she-said-he-said’ stories just to get us to talk. But we shouldn’t fall for their cheap tricks.

Have no regrets
Most friendships help us become better people. That’s why we shouldn’t blame ourselves for being in a toxic one. It’s part of life. We grow, learn, and move on. However, let’s keep this experience in mind, so it doesn’t happen again.


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Your thoughts

plz i'm new here

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey chrisdove! you are welcome, feel free to comment and share with friends.....we are here to help

10x chommy

Welcome

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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??? star ave u eva unfriend a toxic friend just saying!

Hey Dezmond19! I don't understand ur question , pls could u explain better?

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

hmmm.I have 3 friends. we have been friends for 5 years but yet de don't understand me .....they don't even know my likes and dislikes

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey Teecute! Thanks for the comment. You all have are at fault here. 5 years is a long time to know someone. You all need to sit down and talk about all these things. Gist about it and pay attention to these details. Also, when they do things you do not like, always remember to lovingly point it out to them so that they do. You should do the same thing when they do something you like. Friendships and relationships require lots of effort and people that are willing to make it work. We hope this helps

hi bigsister

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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WOW! YOU'RE MY NAMESAKE

wow :-)

Buy stop calling them all time.don't give them too much face again.

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

stop moving wit them&let them knw,dat your ways are different

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

I av diz friend that i want her out of my life cuz i thing she is doing something bad that i hate most getting pregnant and aborting it still yet she continue to have sex with that good for nothing guy who pregnant almost two times now and ask her to abort it. Big sis plz how will i tell her that i do not need our friendship anymore huh

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey Joebeauty! Thanks for the comment. Have you tried talking to your friend about the dangers of what she is doing? We think you should talk to her before dumping her as a friend. Guide her and let her know how risky what she is doing is. Even if you do not like what she is doing, it is best to guide her before you end the friendship with her. We hope this helps

is good to date someone older than you

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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No way it is not safe he can impregnate u and after he does dat he can dump u or deny the pregnancy which can cause u to be very sad and it can also cause suicide so be careful.

HI dora,yes it is possible for a person 2 date a person older dan u,if u guys luv each other.

my nam is bishop,their is one girl i realy love in my lif but, her family is cause a problem in our mix, many a tim. so i sake ur advice my folow friend. her is esther or ginikachi.

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey GEE! Thanks for the comment. We do not know what this problem is or how serious it is but we advise that you both talk it out and agree on how to settle it with her parents. We hope this helps

There is a saying that says; "tell me your friend and i will tell you who you are" :D friends matter most so we should be careful. Thank

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

bigsister how will i let go of friends that alway talk about sex in the class.

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey chioma! Thanks for the comment. You need to politely let them know that you are not interested in having such conversation with them. Also, since you are not interested in that type of conversation, you can excuse yourself whenever they start the conversation. Then you gradually cut communication with them. We hope this helps

bigsis pls answer me i have been waiting to see ur answer

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

a girl is nt mearnt to be aslave

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

No talks

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

Aspire To Inspire Before You Expire

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

Tanks

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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I think u should report her to a mature person #privately to safe her life..... ......i think dats wat friends are 4 😇😇😇

I dunno if it's safe to share a story here but lemme try I have asthma and it's very chronic and there is this friend of mine who is pretending to be asthmatic so that she get d same treatment as mine I mean special treatment she never cares about me and anytime I have an attack around her she also faked an attack I keep warning her on the danger of taking inhaler wen not asthmatic but she prove stubborn I dunno what to do anymore thanks

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey joan! Thanks for the comment. We are so sorry about this. It can be really painful when you are going through a situation and someone else is trying to use it to get attention. You should cut off communication with her. You have done your best by telling her the dangers of using an inhaler when she doesn't really need it and it is up to her to listen. Since what she does affects you, you really do not have to be friends with her. Do not quarrel with her, just politely cut her off. A friend that doesn't care about you is not really a friend. We hope this helps

thank you very much

thanks

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

thanks for the advice

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

Am new I want yr advice i have a friend who helps me in a lot of things which i appreciate but she talks down on me which makes me sad i really need your help on what to do

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey Purity! You need to talk to your friend about this and let her know how you feel. She may not even be aware of how she treats you. Just sit down with her and let her know this. It is from the conversation that you will know what to do later. We hope this helps

I have a friend who is a boy...... We just talk about our studies and other academic stuff........is dat all Wat friendship is?????? Or more than that

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Hey Eazi16! That is what friendship means to him. What does friendship mean to you? He is obviously after your progress and academic growth and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. We hope this helps

Hi deer is a gal she is my class mate and also my frnd BT in my absence she says rubbish about me Wat do I do?

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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She’s not your friend . Avoid her

Hey akilo123! Faboulous is very correct. A good friend will not say bad things about you but will always stand up for you especially when you are not around. This girl is not your friend. You need to watch out. We hope this helps

your truth big sister akilo 123 big sister she is a goo friend

Big sis anser now Av bring waiting fr reply

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

This is very interesting i am happy to be here! because am learning more & more

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

a friendship is a very expensive relationship

March 20, 2022, 7:58 p.m.

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Dat is very correct curio! are u new here?

hi curio,why did u say dat friendship is very expensive?Can u buy friendship?Cos i have not seen such.

very funny Precious i am sure you understand what curio said you are just misunderstanding what she said purposely and if not she said that you cannot just find good friends like that so it is very expensive*-*.

Yh friendship is expensive but u can nt buy Let me explain wat friendship being expensive is. It means friendship is valueable nd strong

exactly jenni

that is truth jenni may allah bless u

Yeah I Had One B4 Ad We Broke Up By Exchanging Text Msg 2 Each Oda

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

I haven't seen such type of toxic friends b4 I think Dis is happening in our world today but breaking up an already existing friendship isn't easy at all!!!!!!

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

But it is not easy to break up with a friend just like that.....because me too wants to break with a friend but I don't know how to break up with her.... pls what can I do

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey fummy! Thanks for the comment. We have given you tips in the article above. Please follow the steps and the tips we have given. We hope this helps

But it is not easy to break up with a friend just like that.....because me too wants to break with a friend but I don't know how to break up with her.... pls what can I do

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. We know that it is hard to let go of friends and that is why we have written this article for you. Please follow the steps and the tips we gave. We are sure they will work for you. We hope this helps

True words but for me I let go of frnds without saying anything to them ,I jst let go slowly n gradually am out .I won't even tell dem am leaving

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

that is a good idea thank's

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

i love the way u did urz but am trying to do same and i find myself still goin close to them can u help me with some diciplines on how to let go of them?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey mzzycool! Thanks for the comment. We have given you the easiest tips on how to let go of friends. However, you need to know that it begins with you. You have to make up your mind that this is not what you want because if you don't even have valid reasons why you should not be friends with someone in the first place, you won't be strongly convinced to let them go and so, this can make you go back to them. So, the first step for you to know what you want for yourself first. We hope this helps

I cherish your idea nd i believe it will work for me

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey Piro! We are glad you like the idea. Please try it out and let us know how it goes. We hope this helps

big sis u so wonderful

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Thanks baby! Big sis loves you

big sis i want to be lyk uu

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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I also want to be like her she always has answers and good advices to the young minds of we springsters, I pray that when I grow up I will have a site like this to help the young minds around the world, my site will me under springster. I will start saving money for this at the age of 18 when I will be an adult and I know that God will help me and also you to be like big sister

Hey brown and Fortune! Big sister is always excited when she sees comments like this. You are both amazing and awesome. The truth is that you can be whatever you want to if you only believe in your dreams. Yes, Fortune, it is good to start saving and planning towards it. Know that you have all the support in the world from Big Sister. See you both at the top!

Big sis yhu are so wonderful

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey Twerkergirl! Awwww... Thanks a lot for your comment. Big sister appreciates you.

I have a friend,we've been friends for years now and she eventually ran into prostitution and people around our area are thinking we are into same life buh am innocent,what can i do?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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Hey kweenest! Thanks for the comment. You need to talk to her about this thing that she is doing. You need to let her know the dangers of doing such things. Also, you need to know that people will talk regardless but it is the way you behave that will justify whether you are into prostitution or not. Right now, your focus should not be what others say but to get your friend out of this job because she is at great risk. There is also a professional body you can speak to called, The Women at Risk Foundation who help young women who are faced with similar situations such as yours. You can call them on 08 09 21 00 00 9. This service is completely confidential-which means they won’t share what you say to them with other people. While reaching out, please note that you would be charged for it. We hope this helps

I ALWAYS TALK TO HER

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

I will advice u not to say offensive word

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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exactly

by not concetrete to them, anymore

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

bt why is page for boys not created u guys are cheating on us it is not fair we need our right.Reply me oooh

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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wonderfuldoer just because this forum was created for we girls does not mean you guys can't join us you can because we are all here to share ideas and know things which we don't know can't you see other boys comments?so feel free to ask questions.

then create one.

dont mind dem jare ,u boys too are free here too,and even u always ask question.so u dont need to complain cos big sister is here for guys too asnd i guess guy can meet here too and as cutie sad you can create one.

We need page for boys too

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Good friend

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

She always mess up with my head then i let go of everything and she is proud

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

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hmm am confused,how do u mean dear?

tnx

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

I've not let go yet but am planning to

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

I have not leave the friend but i am planning to

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

wat if dey don't want to leave..???

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

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Hey Elen! Thanks for the comment. You are the one to make the move to leave the friendship. Once you make the move and follow the tips in the article, it will be easier for them to understand that you are no longer interested. However, if they still refuse to let you go, please talk to a trusted adult for guidance. We hope this helps

What if they beg us

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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Hey Holuwahkhemyy! Thanks for the comment. You need to be sure that they are begging not just for begging sake but because they are ready to change and be of better behavior. The final decision is up to you to make. We hope this helps

Wat if they say they are sorry a lot of time when they are not

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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just ignore them

Hey Kelly! Thanks for the comment. If they are saying sorry all the time and do not mean it then they are not remorseful and you should let them go. We hope this helps

I HAVE A FRIEND WHO FORM TO CARE FOR ME BUT HOW WILL I NO WEATHER THE CARE IS REAL

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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you need to test d person

test? how?

test? how?

hey prospehdro,what I mean is that he should pretend to be annoying and he should decide according to d persons reaction.

Hi capable51 testing the person is not the best cause the person might even know u are faking it and when u have finished testing the someday that person may discover it and they would be sad because u tested them for u to find a good and caring friend then look for them and u will surely see them believe me u will surely see them bye later.

Big sis wat if it hard 4 u to let go of dat frd

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Well its is not easy to let go.😩😩. ..i dont think i have any bad friend tho..am jus cool😎😎 with the only friend i have and i do love💓💖her👌

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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Hi floxy-bae

Hello floxy-bae,how far.

I neglected her looking for some excuses when she wants to be with me

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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Dally please what actually happened between u both.

If they call my attention for something I use to give an excuse, coz gat me cried I also will always neglect them.

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

I ve a friend I always try 2ignore her but she kept disturbing me

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

hi sallet and oj

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Hello prs,how are you,hope you are doing great.

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

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yes wat abt u

I'm fine.

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Nice talk about toxic friends

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Wow! I've Learned Somtin 2day, Special Tnx 2 Big Sis.

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

I luv catering i want to learn it but I'm tinkin of d stuff and I am scared of hot oil big sis wat can I do

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

well,I have a friend, she helps me in my studies but she is a lesbian . what should I do?

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

Letting go of people isn't easy

March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.

Hi am new here

March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.

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Welcome

Hi am new here

March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.

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Hi your welcome