How can I fix it?
Dear Big Sister,
I am 17 years old and my boyfriend is 18. We have been together for a year.
My boyfriend is nice and caring. He always tries his best to make me happy.
But a few months ago he moved outside Lagos with his parents. And since he moved he has been acting funny.
We don’t talk as much as we use to. He barely calls me. Anytime I call him, he always sounds like he is a hurry to drop the phone.
I really like this guy and I know he likes me too. I don’t want to lose this relationship.
What can I do?
Yours truly
Amaka
Hi Amaka,
Thanks for opening up.
Relationships can be tough. It is good to see that you are trying to make it work.
You said he just moved. Maybe he’s missing his old neighbourhood and is a little sad. Maybe he has to travel further to school or work, so his schedule has changed.
He may just still be trying to adjust to his new surroundings. Truth is, the only way to really know what’s going on is to talk to him. You need to have a heart-to-heart talk with him.
You need to let him know how he’s changed. And how it makes you feel. Reassure him about how much he means to you. Ask him what you can do to help him through whatever is making him act this way.
When you talk to him, be patient and speak to him with love. This way he won’t think you are trying to pick up a fight with him.
Don’t worry girl, you got this!
Let me know how it goes.
Big Sister
Want to read more inspiring stories like this one? Then head to our Springster Facebook page and connect with a community of girls just like you! - https://www.facebook.com/heyspringster
Share your feedback
Your thoughts
markw285355
Me and my girlfriend were dating like 2years ago when I got an admission to another state if I called her she we pick it but she don’t want to talk to me anymore one day she told me that she have broke up with me because she have see another man so and I love my girlfriend I want my girlfriend to come bank to me big sister
May 12, 2022, 2:45 p.m.
I like a boy in my school and my best friend lyks him but his brother also lyks me pls what should I do
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Darlingangel3! Thanks for the comment. This is a very complicated cycle and you need to be sure of what you feel for him. Is it love or a crush? We have written an article to help you know the difference. Please search for "Crush vs Love: Know The Difference". Once you are sure of what you feel for him, you will know what to do or you can come back to big sister for guidance. We hope this helps
Fact. Run away from those boys. Both of em.
Hello Big Sis Am 18 and my girlfriend is 17 i called her on phone yesterday and she said she have something to tell me,and i told her to go ahead and say it,and she started by saying that am a woman wrapper,that i due act like a woman and that am afraid to talk to her,to be frank i was speechless and i don't no what to do please Big sis help me out i do want to loose her please tell me what to do.
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. We are so sorry about this. We totally get how this makes you feel and we know that it can be sad. Do you feel like you are afraid to talk to her? Ask her to tell you what she wants and how she wants to be treated. Also try to work towards it. It is a gradual process and she needs to know that it may take some time to see changes in you. We hope this helps
Thank you Big sis it will help alot.
Hi Big sis I am 13and I have a BF is it a bad thing
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey inuwa! This is a personal decision and it is up to you to make. There is no particular age for you to start dating. We hope this helps
hey big sis!!!.. am kinda like in the middle of a relationship which am not sure I want.. There was a time,i saved my boyfriend's mother pictures on facebook and sent it too him on whatup saying she was an amazing woman... he flared up too my surprise and was asking where I got the pictures from... I told him and he said he didn't appreciate anyone having pictures of his family on their phone.. I was really surprised cuz I was meant too be an exception.. he later said if anything happened too them. he did hate me for the rest of his life... I guess I liked him that much bcoz I overlooked what he said ..but now am beginning too doubt if his actually right for me.. we've planned our future together and am scared of what I don't know.. besides we are in a long distance relationship.. he claims too love me all the time..and he rarely posts my pictures on social media .but he posts other girls picture.i gets fast heartbeat anytime I see it..am not sure if I still love him. and am having mixed feelings..he says he misses me all the time,i told him he was lying..he said he didn't like showing his emotions and so I could not tell how he felt which is basically true.we always end up in a fight,he says m too emotional which I guess is a bad thing ,that I think too much.... please I seriously need your advice.. what should I do?? quit or stay put????
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Tasha! Thanks for the comment. First of all, there is nothing wrong with being too emotional. This is who you are and no one should make you feel bad for being that way. Secondly and most importantly, you need to have this conversation. You both need to talk about all these things. Communication is very important in every relationship and if you cannot talk about what hurts you, then what exactly are you talking about? We hope this helps
hy spingsters am new here plz wat dis group about
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey HAD! Thanks for the comment and welcome to Springster. This is a group for young girls in Nigeria. We write stories based on the issues Nigerian teenage girls face and also have a Big Sister who will answer ALL your questions. To know more about this platform, kindly read our FAQs below. We hope this helps
this is though
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
big sis am having a serious problem with my relationship my friend fell in love with my girl i just because he didn't now I am dating her
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
big sis am having a serious problem with my relationship my friend fell in love with my girl i just because he didn't now I am dating her help me out please
Hey dreasys! Thanks for the comment. This should not be a problem. Both you and your girl should let your friend know about your relationship. Be polite while you do this. Let him also know how long you both have been dating so that he knows you are real. We hope this helps
hi big sister... is it possible for me to love again though am in a relationship due to pass relationship i had... loving someone is hard for me... what should i do?
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
This girl ah so much love, broke up with me for same reason. It just makes me hate every stupid guy or player. Including my brother
Am new here.... Tho am 22
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
And is it good to fall in love when you are alone??
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Itz_ella00! Thanks for the comment. There's a lot involved in falling in love. You need to know the person very well before you can even say that you are in love with a person. When you are lonely, you tend to be desperate to be with someone else. You need to first of all learnt to be content with yourself and in love with your company before you can love someone else. We hope this helps
Falling when you're alone is fun, but sometimes its stupid. When you're alone you tend to easily fall in love with any boy who shows you little care, weda smart or dumb. Even if its fake
Hey big sis I fell in love wiff a guy ah meet on fb who hapens to b a cousin to mah frnd......we've started dating online.....den we lost contact 4 ah tink 2 yrs......he later appears bck in mah lyf dis tym he's left d country buh he told me he still wants d relationship to continue, ah allowed it bcuz ah love him.......d prob nw is dat we've nt been chatting as we use to do he is nt responing lyk he use to do......its making me miss him alot cux ah love......am confused.....wah shuld ah do
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Hey big sis I fell in love wiff a guy ah meet on fb who hapens to b a cousin to mah frnd......we've started dating online.....den we lost contact 4 ah tink 2 yrs......he later appears bck in mah lyf dis tym he's left d country buh he told me he still wants d relationship to continue, ah allowed it bcuz ah love him.......d prob nw is dat we've nt been chatting as we use to do he is nt responing lyk he use to do......its making me miss him alot cux ah love......am confused.....wah shuld ah do
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Hey big sis I fell in love wiff a guy ah meet on fb who hapens to b a cousin to mah frnd......we've started dating online.....den we lost contact 4 ah tink 2 yrs......he later appears bck in mah lyf dis tym he's left d country buh he told me he still wants d relationship to continue, ah allowed it bcuz ah love him.......d prob nw is dat we've nt been chatting as we use to do he is nt responing lyk he use to do......its making me miss him alot cux ah love......am confused.....wah shuld ah do......hw do ah keep mah lng distance relationship
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Forget the boy. He's moved on. Any boy would probably do same, including my self
hey big sis,am dating a shy guy,though he loves me but he found it difficult to talk to me or even look into my eye,he his always shy,and also am a shy type but i try not to be shy but i cant just do that,though we chart on facebook but whenever we are together we are always shy.
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Lol. Stupid shy boy. Show up in front of him naked. Have sex with him. Or do nasty things together, he'll stop. He'll probably thank you later. #BelieveME
Amaka sorry to break it to you. He's probably got another girl. So just move find somebody better or wait for him to find. Guys dont really care. #Fact
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
hello big sister,am new here I want you to explain something's to me...I have a boyfriend we both love each other and he cares abh me and make sure i feel good.but the thing is he doesn't like Sharing his problems he prefers to bare it alone which I will always notice DAT his not feeling too happy and when I ask he says "I will take care of it myself okay which am not happy with I don't know what to do to change all these... waiting for ur reply big sister
March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. The truth is that you cannot change anyone. The best you can do is to make him understand that you are available and a shoulder that he can lean on. Be patient with him and do not try to force him to talk to you about certain things. We are all different and he obviously is used to keeping things to himself so you really cannot blame him for not sharing his problem. Just be patient and be there for him. He will loosen up eventually. We hope this helps
Hmmm
my thought is what happened
March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.