I think I’m pregnant

What to do next

Your thoughts (120)

Dear Big Sister,
There is fire on the mountain! Some time ago, I slept with my boyfriend Chude. We didn’t use protection, but it was no big deal. We love and trust each other very much.

Then last month, I started feeling super tired every morning. I thought it was because of my chores. So I wasn’t bothered. Then my waist grew thicker and my breasts became tender. My aunty even teased me about my new shape.

But now my period has refused to come! At first, I wasn’t worried o. Sometimes it’s delayed by a day or two. Then three days passed, and…nothing! That’s when I knew trouble had come.

Big Sister, I think I’m pregnant! I don’t know what to do or who to talk to. I’ve thought of telling Chude, but it seems like a bad idea. There’s this health centre in my community sha. I want to go there and check, but I don’t want my gist to reach my aunty’s ears.

This isn’t the plan I had for my life. I’m only 16! Please help me. Big Sister! I’m losing my mind.

Yours truly,
Susu


Dearest Susu,
Let me start by saying you’re not alone. Many girls all over the world have been in this same situation. In the end, they emerged stronger, wiser, and better for it. And so will you.

An unplanned pregnancy can be tough. But when you know what to do next, things can be a bit easier.

First, you need to be 100% sure you’re pregnant. So you need to take a pregnancy test. It helps to have a trusted adult in your corner. They could take you to a clinic and support you through the whole process.

Your aunty sounds like a cool person. Maybe you should try confiding in her. You might just be surprised by her reaction. For all you know, she may have been in your shoes before. So she’ll have firsthand experience to guide you. Even if she gets disappointed she may also be willing to support you.

If you don’t feel like you can talk to your aunty, is there any other adult you can confide in? If there’s no one, you can get in touch with an organization called Education as a Vaccine. They run a helpline where you can find out about sex, pregnancy and other health issues. They are open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. Call them on 08027192781 and get the support you need. Please not you will be charged for calls and it’s completely confidential so you don’t need to share your name.

That being said, there’s someone you really need to talk to: Chude. It takes two people to make a baby. Pregnancy isn’t a girl’s/woman’s responsibility alone. If you happen to be pregnant, Chude has to take responsibility for his baby. It’s best to tell him what’s going on.

Before talking to him, practice what you’ll say. It’ll help boost your confidence. Try to be calm, but firm. Choose a time and a place where you’ll be very comfortable.

Next, you and Chude need to find a good clinic. Then visit together (along with a supportive adult if possible) and talk to a health professional. They’ll perform a pregnancy test on you. And if you’re pregnant, they’ll tell you how to take good care of yourself. Don’t you worry, okay? All will be well in the end. Remember if you don’t know of any clinic near you, you can speak to the people at Education as a Vaccine.

Remember, having unprotected sex can lead to pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases (STDS). The surest way to avoid them is by not having sex. If you have any more questions, please talk to an experienced health professional.

Thanks for sharing your story, Susu. Here’s hoping you feel better already. I wish you all the best.

Lots of Love,
Big Sister

Want to read more inspiring stories like this one? Then head to our Springster Facebook page and connect with a community of girls just like you! - https://www.facebook.com/heyspringster

Share your feedback

Your thoughts

No not at all , i'll wait till my wedding day

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

No Bt My Boyfrnd Wants Sex Bt Wit Dis Am Nt Giving Out.Thanks Am Learning A Lot.

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

@shine, if u never had sex b4, don't try it

can a guy with a small dick impregnate a girl

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey lhord! Thanks for the comment. The size of the dick cannot stop you from getting pregnant. No matter how small the dick is, as long as the boy has reached puberty, he can get you pregnant. Please note that a small dick get you pregnant. Size does not matter in this case. We hope this helps

men sha! dis same thing happen 2 my neigbour, bt her bf refuse nd d9 d pregnancy. nw d its about 6month.

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey enyola! Thanks for the comment. It is not always the boy's fault. Like in the article, you can see that Chude is not even aware of what Susu is going through because she has not yet told him. It is not every time that the girls get rejected and this is why you both need to be ready for the responsibilities that come with sex and relationships and this includes the risk of getting pregnant. So, it is not fair to always blame the guy because as long as it was not rape, the two parties are responsible for this. We hope this helps

Daylight

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Try to be ur self

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Hmmm Dis Is Serious Abstinence Is The Best!

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Hi big sis! pls what drugs can someone take to prevent pregnancy after sex?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Ma! Thanks for the comment. We cannot prescribe any drug for you. This is the job of a doctor or pharmacist. We advise that you talk to a trusted adult and see a certified doctor or pharmacist. We hope this helps

come on don't be greedy big sis

there is a boy that always disturbed Me but I don't know what to do

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey kidspring! Thanks for the comment. You should do nothing about it. The fact that someone is disturbing you does not mean that you should say yes to him. You need to, first of all, know what you want for yourself and if he does not fit in, do not force him in. We hope this helps

My aunt took for a test and said that am no longer a virgin, but I know in my life that I have never sleep or slept with a man so am confused. What if my bf asked me if am a virgin what will i say? please reply me

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

if u knew very well dat u hav never slept wit an opposite sex b4,den hav faith in urself don't feel borthered about anybody,do ur things ur own way

Sexual intercourse is not the only way for one to lose her virginity. Once there is some form of penetration (fingering etc), there are high chances of one losing her virginity. Also, some girls lose their virginity through rigorous exercise (e.g splitting) or even riding a bicycle. Do not let this bother you. Your virginity does not define who you are neither does it make you a bad girl. You are who you are and no one should define you based on virginity. We hope this helps.

there was a girl I heard about her being pregnant. she took an injection to give birth to the baby at about four months, is that dangerous to her health and how?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Martie! Thanks for the comment. What she did was very dangerous and she could have lost her life through that process as she was young for that. We are sure the baby is still not alive because that was a D&C that was done. It is risky and also a very painful process. We hope this helps

big sis pls is there any abortion pills for three months

Hello big sister,my bf kinda wants sex from me.he assisted me sometime ago I didn't know he was planning for sex,fortunately he attempted sex 3 tyms wen we were alone on different occasions,I refused him the 3rd time and tld him I don't want any if dis again he was like "OK cool" but then he kinda changed a lot and now he kinda wants a break up but am not ready to let go if him I think the only way now to keep him in is having sex and an not ready for DAT either....... I know its not a big deal to open ur legs but thinking about having sex now is jus far from me TWO different guys are also asking me for sex (close friends)why is sex d only language guys understand???? Am I the only sex victim???? My female friends have all had sex Why do I see sex like a hard thing to do???? Its like its an obligatory duties for teenagers to have sex Is it a crime accepting help from guys without them having the mindset to sleep with you???? Why do I feel sex is not everything??? Am not saying this ironically to mock anyone,am saying DAT d pressure is jus too much How do I see d 'Mr right' if every guy wants one thing (sex)????? Am 16 and d pte

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Am 16 and d pressure is too much for me How do i go about with my boyfriend???? Talking to an adult won't help me as they will think bad of me Please ma wat do i do??? Shud I agree with the break up???? How do I tackle the situation next time someone wants sex from me Because they don't tell me,they jus wait till wen we are alone and dey seduce me (romance)which is hard to denial them (i fear it may lead to rape so I jus play along not intentional tho,but wen it gets thus far I refuse) its really hard to say no at that point but I've been escaping it...I don't think I can any longer So what's d best way to handle such situation next time

Hey Khloe! Thanks for the comment. We totally understand how you feel right now and trust me, you are not alone. To address your points and worries, you need to first of all note that Sex is not love and no one should force or blackmail you to have sex with them. If you are not ready to have sex then you have every right to say NO. Secondly, you are not a victim. You have every right to say NO to what you do not want. Remember it is your body so do not let him try to take what is yours without your consent. Thirdly, sex IS NOT AN OBLIGATION. It is totally voluntary. If you do not want it, just say NO. Please and please note that this guy is in this relationship for just sex and nothing more than that. The other guys are also out for sex only and nothing else too. A guy that loves you will not threaten to break up with you because you refused to have sex with them. If he truly loves you like he claims, he will respect your decision and not pressure you to have sex. Do not join the crowd, believe in what you want for yourself. If he wants a break up, it's fine girl, you deserve someone better than him. You need to think of what you want in a relationship and in a partner and then take time out before you rush into a relationship. We hope this helps

Thank you big sister you rock...!!!!👍👍 Am gonna talk to him about that,with what you've said, am giving him the break up *its hard tho* but I will ☺☺☺

Dear Khloe! You are welcome. We are glad we could be of help to you. Breakups are hard but know that this is for your own good. Just know that you will be fine. Do not be in a hurry to get into a relationship. Know what you want for yourself and in your relationship before you get into a relationship with anyone. We hope this helps

BIG SIS Pls I Need Your Advice I Had An Abortion And It Up To A Month Now Just Last Week I Bleed Seriously Am I Ok

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. You need to talk to a trusted adult and see a doctor immediately. We hope this helps

hye big sis am confused some small childrend which dnt no any thing about sex and having sex with each other and both of them have nt yet matured does dat me the girl have lose her virginity from small

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey DOLLA! Thanks for the comment. Knowledge of sex does not matter when it comes to losing virginity. As long as penetration occurred, the girl is no longer a virgin. She does not have to be matured to lose her virginity. We hope this helps

hye anty am confuss if a girl is a virgin and have a sex and disvigin her self will she get pregant for the first time

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey DOLLA! Yes, she can. You do not have to have sex more than once to get pregnant. If you must have sex, please use a condom. We hope this helps.

BIG SIS PLS WHAT IS D DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MENSTRUATION AND OVULATION ?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey VAMPARINA! Thanks for the comment. They are both different things but are born out of a similar process. Ovulation is the process where the eggs are produced in the ovaries while menstruation is the process where the unfertilized eggs (from ovulation) and the uterus lining sheds thus causing blood to come out of the vagina. We hope this helps

Big sister can a girl get pregnant without sex????

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. Yes, it is possible. Penetration is not the only way to get a girl pregnant. As long as the sperm gets into the vagina, there are chances of getting pregnant. Sperm can get into the vagina through fingers (if the sperm gets in contact with the fingers and these fingers touch the vagina, pregnancy can occur). Sperm can also get into the vagina if the boy ejaculates near the vagina. So you see, these are just a few ways a girl can get pregnant without penetration. We hope this helps.

Hi Big sis! I was in My fertile day than I have unprotected sex unfortunately the sperm get's into my body,than I mixed lip ton and lime and drank it for 3day's, pls I want to ask u whether the lip ton and lime will kill the sperm?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey jana! Thanks for the comment. Lipton and lime CANNOT do anything to kill sperm. This is a myth and it does not work. Please and please, you should always use a condom but if you do not, your first point of call should be to talk to a trusted adult and see a doctor immediately. Jana, we advise you to go and see a doctor now and also go for a pregnancy test to know the state of things. Also, you need to test for STDs because pregnancy is not the only risk involved when you have unprotected sex. We hope this helps

My Date Had Sex With Me Without Using Condom, And He Sperm On Me The Problem Dat Am Having Now Is That When Ever I Want To Pie It Will Pain Me Seriouly In My Abdomen Pls Big Sister What Do I Do?

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Adaora! Thanks for the comment. You need to talk to a trusted adult and see a doctor immediately. This may be an infection but you need to run a test to confirm. Please and please, if you must have sex, always use a condom. We hope this helps

big sister please help me out of this mess that i found my self,my boyfriend inpregnate me and he is denying it that he is the owner of the pregnancy when he also know that he is the only one am dating. but he is denying about knowing anything to do with the pregnant please i need your advice

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Dont hate urself for dat, it do happen, but i will just tell u to be strong and don't hate ur boyfriend. And also talk to a trusted adult about ur situation 4 more councelling. I hope this will help.

Hey JOKKIE! Thanks for the comment. We are so sorry about this. This is a very delicate situation and can also hurt a lot. We advise you to talk to a trusted adult like Cathy advised. An adult is in a better situation to handle this issue. We know that you are very worried but you need to talk to someone you trust about this. Also, there is an organization called 'Education as a Vaccine' who run a Helpline that you can call and find out everything you need to know about health issues, including menstruation and pregnancy. The number is 08 02 71 92 781 and it's free if you call from Airtel and open Monday to Friday from 9 till 5. It's completely confidential so you don't need to give your name or any details - you can just ask questions and get the support you need. Good luck with everything.

thanks CATHY love heart you big sister love you all !!!!!!

HOW DO U DIFFERENCIATE CRUSH FROM LOVE

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey CATHY! Thanks for the comment. You should read the story we wrote on this topic. Please search for "Crush vs Love: Know The Difference". We hope this helps

Is it proper to carry out an abortion

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Honeydrops! Thanks for the comment. NO, it is not right to do an abortion. It is also very dangerous for you. We advise that you talk to a trusted adult about this. We hope this helps

It is advisable to meet an adult (women)

It is advisable to meet an adult (women)

dear big sister i appreciate your effort in this house and i pray GOD will crown your effort with success (amen) good morning please i want to ask this question that is worry me the question is i had sex this year which has turned to pregnancy but i dont remember the exact month between january or february but because of fear i keep saying is february so my question is if they carried test out on me will it still be the same (january&february) month (maybe january will be 5month,and february also will be 5month) pls am dead worry.

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey SHEJOK! Thanks for the comment. You need to talk to a trusted adult about this and also see a doctor for a proper medical examination because that will give you all the information you are asking for. What you should focus on right now is attending an antenatal class in your local health care center as this will guide you more about pregnancy. We hope this helps

tanks a lot big sis

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

gud morning big sis i have a problem in me dat ive been keeping to my self there was a boy leaving close to my house he proposed to me to b his girlfrnd n i agreed so one day he visited me n we kissed so after dat i told him dat m not ready for a relationship like dis becos he always disturb me to kiss him n m tired of it so i call off d relationship n now his roomate is asking me out n also a new guy in deir compound is already asking me to marry him m confused n i feel ashamed of my self cos i dont want d first boy to think i left him for others m just sixteen years old pls i need ur advice

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Bestie! Thanks for the comment. Please this may be a trap as they may be trying to get back at you. You are just 16 and marriage should be the last thing on your mind. You have a lot of things to achieve so you should not let these guys distract you. You need to first of all know what you want for yourself and be very careful about it. We hope this helps

Big sis my boyfreid have been disturbing me to have a child for him,dat is wat he want.we have sex many time but am not prepnant oo help me out big sis pls

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey NIFEMI! Thanks for the comment. Are you ready for a child? It comes with a lot of responsibilities and you have to be ready to give it your all. You should not have a child because your boyfriend wants you to have a child for him. You should talk to a trusted adult about this too. We hope this helps

Big sis,some people said after a girl or lady has finished mensurating ,is it true that one has somedays to have Free sex without getting pregnant,depend on her body

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Calista! You should always use a condom if you must have sex. Pregnancy is not the only risk involved when you have unprotected sex. You also stand a chance of getting STDs/STIs and even HIV. If you must have sex, always use a condom. We hope this helps

Big sis,some people said after a girl or lady has finished mensurating ,is it true that one has somedays to have Free sex without getting pregnant,depend on her body

March 20, 2022, 7:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Ur not serious Abstain what's so interesting it that read ur bible follow Jesus

Sam1 is your dad a pastor or what cause what you are saying are hurtful I did not say you should not preach the gospel of our lord Jesus Christ but what am trying to say is that you are not suppose to say hurtful words to people here they are only trying to be enlighten and just enlighten them please,even if you are saying hurtful things here I will still say hello Sam1 nice meeting a Pastor here welcome.

sam1.i guess you're starting to offend people.like jbaby she is getting angry i knew you are a christain so am i but i cant fall in to these .just watch over yourselve and be holy.but i understand that you are trying to bring youth closer to God best of luck.thanks for sharing the gospel with us

how can a virgin get pregnant?

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. A girl can get pregnant through penetration or if the sperm gets into her vagina (through sexual intercourse or through fingering). We hope this helps

pls big am going too the university but cant cook is it bad if i have a gf too,do that for me in my house ad live with me the problem is it only 1 bed room ad i dont want to have sex with any gal a freind of mine told me i wont be able to,hold myself

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Tenny007! First of all, a girlfriend is not meant to be a cook or an object to help you do things. If you want to eat, you should either LEARN HOW TO COOK OR BUY FOOD! It's that simple. Are you really going to school to eat/get a free stay in cook or are you going to school to learn. This is a very wrong mindset and you need to know that this is not what women/females are all about. You need to change your mindset and for your own sanity, you should learn how to cook if you want to eat. But really, why is it not an option for you to learn how to cook? Females are more than the food they cook, anyone that wants to eat should either be able to buy the food or be able to cook the food. We hope this helps

how will i survie i dont know anything abt cooking

Look u can download cooking videos OK or get cook books Wish u the best

You will meet some friends at school who are good at cooking,you can join them by contributing money to cook and yu learn from them gradually

You will meet some friends at school who are good at cooking,you can join them by contributing money to cook and yu learn from them gradually

hey big sister,for how long can a person know she's pregnant,like if I should go for a pregnancy test,i Had sex on Monday today is making the third day,will the pregnancy test show positive result

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. It takes about 2 weeks after having unprotected sex to get accurate results. We advise that you also run an STD/STI and even HIV test because this is also a risk involved in having unprotected sex. We hope this helps

please big sister,can someone get pregnant by having sex few days(two days) to her monthly flow

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. Once you have unprotected sex, you stand a high chance of getting pregnant and also getting infected with an STD/STI or even HIV. If you must have sex, please use a condom. We hope this helps

U encouraging nonsense

Ur encouraging nonsense

Sam1 what you are saying is not why should you be saying all this to big sis that she is encouraging nonsense dear let me you what she is doing is not nonsense she is only giving advise and not discourage please stop I beg you.

Big sis won't it better for us to all abstain from sex rather than use protection that can fail at any time?

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. Sex is a personal decision and it is up to you to make this decision. We advocate protected sex because not everyone believes in abstinence and we cannot impose beliefs on people. Yes, abstinence is the safest method but for those that are already sexually active, using protection is key for them. We hope this helps

That is utter dreck are u born again big sis If u are this dreck will not be coming out of u God clearly Say's do not have sex till ur married or the consequences will be dreadful So abstain from it

I think it is better to try and abstain from sex until you are old enough and ready enough to care for a baby

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

I think it is better to try and abstain from sex until you are old enough and ready enough to care for a baby

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

I thinks you should avoid sex you no

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Having sex is not a big deal, but alway's use gold circle just for protection. And also make sure u are up to 18+

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

excuse me please what is a gold circle

It is most advisable to abstain from sex u know.

hello guys bessy gold circle is a type of condom.

David2019 to me sex is a very huge deal cause you have to be ready first cause anything can happen I don't trust any type of condom cause they might be fake and remember that sometimes the sperm can mistakenly enter the vagina if not worn properly and you must be ready for any unplanned stuff that happens that my reasons why I say that sex is a big deal.

Hey David2019! Thanks for the comment. Please note that condoms are not 100% safe so encouraging others to do something that is not safe is not right as condoms break too. We hope this helps

this's my firstime here. what are d symtoms of having pregnant?

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. There are different signs and symptoms and this is different for every pregnancy and so is it different for everyone. We advise that you pay attention to your body and also go for pregnancy test to confirm. We hope this helps

what are the symtoms of pregnancy?

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

can a girl be pregnant without the penetration of the penis into the vagina

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

My teacher said it is possible:through insertion of d sperm into d woman(maybe injecting).

I slept with my bf last week ND any time I want to urinate my private part pains me and blood usually comes out pls big sister am I pregnant

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

I pity u

Lol

Hmmm.....

Adeola I advice you to go and see a doctor cause what you said seems like an infection to me but am not I doctor I still advice you to go see a doctor please.

Hey Adeola! Thanks for the comment. Please talk to a trusted adult and see a doctor immediately. It could be an infection. We hope this helps

Nawa tho

He adeola...dis is a symptom of gonorea

It's some kind of STD, hmm, u didn't protect yourself did you...

It is a big deal !! God Say's do not defile you're self till ur married and u guys are just encouraging nonsense, utter dreck. You could go to hell for this and look God does not care about age only if ur born again.Find a good church and worship and praise him. Jesus is at the door. BEWARE

March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

You see this isn't about religion for now, yes it's wrong but the thing is this girl is scared, she needs all the support she could get and you're here yapping she's gonna go to hell. First things first, encourage not to abort her baby then other thing comes after

What were your symptoms?

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

pls I need an answer, wht time can I have sex with a female that she can't get pregnant?

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Big Sis, I read in a book that a lady who is pregnant might still have her period. Is it true? And also, till what time will that lady have her period while she is pregnant?

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Big sis i had sex with my boyfriend last two months ND i didn't see my period last month ND he infected me plss is it the infection dat stopped my period

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

Hey Yes, I advice you to go to the hospital for a proper check -up or still go for test.

March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.

hello big sister am new here .....my question is dat my boyfriend is asking me for sex pls wat can i du and i realy love him

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

I advise you just to go for a check up then you know what to do then

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

Big sis Is it normal wen pple aren't asking me out

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey hanie45! Thanks for the comment. There is nothing wrong with people asking you out. It is perfectly normal and you have nothing to worry about. We hope this helps

Hey big sis..can a guy of 15 years old pregnant a girl of 9 year...no penetration but he pour on it

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

haha not possible

Hey big sis! I would just like to know if something like this happened would abortion be an option? This hasn't happened to me or anyone I know but I'm just curious.

March 20, 2022, 7:54 p.m.

Hey big sister I really need ur reply I had sex with my girlfriend when I want to pour I will remove it please can she get pregnant

March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.

can pregnance lead to lost of shape

March 20, 2022, 7:53 p.m.