Find your true calling
Dear Big Sister,
Up until last month, I was the lead singer in my neighbourhood youth choir. I loved it so much. Everyone said I was going places. I really thought I’d fulfill my dream of becoming a musician.
Then my uncle said no decent girl should be a musician. I felt bad. I didn’t want a career nobody respects. So I quit the choir and decided to become a lawyer instead. They looked very smart in their white wigs and elegant gowns.
One day, I read a top lawyer’s interview online. She said it takes many years to study law. I knew I wasn’t cut out for that. So I changed my mind again. This time, I decided to be a dog trainer since I like dogs. When I told my uncle, he laughed and laughed. He said there are no dog trainers in Nigeria. I wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear.
I just want to be somebody in the future, Big Sister. But I’ve run out of ideas. Please help me before I do something crazy.
With thanks,
Leila
Dearest Leila,
As a teenager, I wasn’t sure about what to be in the future—just like you. As if that wasn’t enough, I didn’t have anyone to talk to. Because of that, I decided that when I grew up, I’d help young girls so they wouldn’t go through the same thing as me.
When I told people what I wanted to do, they didn’t get it at all. They said it wasn’t a real job. But I didn’t let them stop me. And now here I am today!
You see, there’s nothing wrong with being a little confused about your future. It happens to all of us. Go easy on yourself, girl.
Thing is, building a great career can be hard. But when you love what you do, you’ll be so happy and content it won’t feel like hard work. Since you love singing, I’m happy to tell you there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being a musician. Being “decent” isn’t about what you do for a living or how you dress. It’s about how you treat others and carry yourself. Female musicians like Simi, Asa and Omawumi are killing it out there.
And they are role models for tons of people. So don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from following your heart.
Always remember, your life belongs to you alone. You should do what you want to do, not what people want you to do. In any case, you can’t please everyone—apart from yourself. So you do you.
Oh, and by the way, there are dog trainers in Nigeria. Your uncle has some catching up to do.
Hope this helps!
Cheers,
Big Sister
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big sis that's true even now I don't know what I what to be in future sometimes I just choose the ones that I do see people do that I like.
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
thank you for the write up big sis ,, i really learned to decide for mysef a career i love most ........
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
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You're welcome cynthia
As 4 d girl Dat wanted 2 be a musician, I'd advice on u 2 pursue ur dreams and have d fear of God. Ur uncle has no right to dictate 4 u not even ur parents they can only guide u. What's ur take on that big sis
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Dear big sister I want to become a ballerina I really love ballet my older sister she had always loved ballet but she gave on her dream I don't want to give up on my dream but I in no dance class I don't have pointe shoes I don't think I have what it takes to be a ballerina but it's my dream and I want to fulfill it what can I don't 😭🙍🖖
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Misty! Thanks for the comment. The first thing you need to do is to believe in your dreams. You are already giving up on yourself by giving excuses. The first thing to do is to believe that you can do it and do not stop until you achieve it. Please, read the article above too, we wrote it because of you. We hope this helps
big sis,i love writing songs and singing them,i dance a lot and very well,i write novels,articles,poems,i love working with my hands,i do all these things because its so easy for me nd i love doing it nd people tell me to go on whenever they read my works or see me dance or sing. The funny thing is i want to be an industrial chemist cos i do well in my science subject especially maths and chemistry,i hate! reading but love creating works that people will enjoy and calculations are my best ,my brother said that i should study theatre arts,i need help cos am sooo confused about the whole thing,my lovely springsters i need your help too.THANKS
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey DollarDame! Thanks for the comment. This is a personal decision and you need to take your time to make this decision because this is pretty much your future. We advise that you talk to a trusted adult and also a guardian counselor. We hope this helps
Big sister i want to become a nurse and i also want to become an accontant please help me big sister am confuse
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Big sister i want to become a nurse and i also want to become an accontant please help me big sister am confuse
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Springster! Thanks for the comment. You cannot combine both professions because they are both in different fields and are both very professional in their fields. You have to think about it properly and know what it is that you are passionate about. You can also talk to a trusted adult or a counselor for more guidance. We hope this helps
Big sis i dont have any plan pls help me ? THANKS
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey TOSIN! Thanks for the comment. This article was written for you and we advise that you read up and follow the tips in the article. We hope this helps
This is similar to what is happening to me... I wanted to become an actress because I loved the way they act... But my uncle told me that actresses in Nigeria are poor that I should become a marine lawyer... But now I'm so confused... Please big sis I need help 🙏❤
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
Latest Reply
Hey Alphette! Thanks for the comment. The first thing you need to do is to take things slow. Do not allow anyone to impose a career on you. Do you even know what a marine lawyer does? Do you know what it entails to be a lawyer? There are a lot of things involved. Please note that a lot of people are out there doing jobs that make them all the money but they do not find fulfillment doing these jobs. You need to know what you like and what you are comfortable doing. What subjects do you like in school? What are your hobbies too? These can help to guide your career path but do not be in a hurry to make a decision regarding this. We hope this helps
all true my life I wanna play football I really love sport but the question is, his football a profession I ask my Dad told me that when I was still young he said you mate go for engineering,doctor and so on what build will I build on,on football so I back out totally from football just to follow my Dad's wish and to make him happy right now it's about choice so what are my driving at now his that never you stop pushing your goal act fast on it my history was really hard on me thank you #JR.
Hi big sis am new here and I need your help. My mum and dad want me to be a lawyer and am not interested in becoming a lawyer but I love jounalist
March 20, 2022, 7:56 p.m.
I have a boyfriend, he is making sex the first priority. He never calls unless I call him and he never replies my text. What do I do? I still love him but I feel he is not the one for me
March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.
Latest Reply
i think u should let him be for now
I have a boyfriend, he is making sex the first priority. He never calls unless I call him and he never replies my text. What do I do? I still love him but I feel he is not the one for me
March 20, 2022, 7:55 p.m.